Captains and Witches?
by Lunara Dragon
Summary: This is a slight crossover with Pirates of the Caribbean and it is a 'what if' situation. Takes place in the episodes of season 7 Charrrmed. What if the soul stuck in Limbo did find a strange way to help his ex-wife with those cursed Pirates?


Captains and Witches?

By: Lunara Dragon/ Dragonstar

Author's Note: Ok this is one of those crazy 'what if' stories that some of our minds like to think up. So please keep that in mind that this is totally for fun because my sub-conscious keeps screaming at me to write it. Thus I am taking a break from _Guardians and The Chameleon King_ to write this humor oneshot. As usual I do not own Charmed or a specific character that will appear in this story (as much as I sometimes wish I did). Please NOTE this it is set during the episode 138 during season 7 but may also make a few references to the episode 150, Seven Year Witch. Charmed © To the WB, paramount etc. PotC © to Disney etc.

On to the story.

**Halliwell Manor**

A pair of green eyes frantically looked over the figure of Paige Matthews who was leaning over the Book of Shadows and complained about being woozy. Piper walked over to her sister and glanced at her.

"Yeah, well, okay. Then we need to go to Magic School since they're obviously not of this time." Paige reported back to Leo after he commented they could not go in their blindly again.

"Who's not?" Phoebe then questioned as she glided through the attic door and looked at her sisters. The owner of the green eyes tensed and smiled at her presence as Cole stood not far from where Phoebe was, but of course went unnoticed since he was stuck on a different cosmic plane with in the same physical space. The group began to talk about Pirates and Phoebe made a comment about 'Like hot Johnny Depp Pirates?'

Cole inwardly lectured himself _"See what happens when you leave the manor to go and talk to Drake. Apparently now they are fighting pirates?" _Of course Cole then noted that there was not much he could do from his spiritual prison to help but he still wanted to make sure that he watched over his lost love and her family. Cole saw the group as they left to go to magic school and Phoebe split to follow through with another of her personal plans. Cole wanted to make sure Paige was ok, but Phoebe won out in the situation as she always did and he followed her to the bottom floor of the manor.

Cole tensed when Phoebe muttered to herself about going in to work and found his own jealousy rising. The former demon did not very much care for her current ghost-writer, Leslie, and avoided his ex-wife's place of employment like the plague.

"Great well let's see what brilliant idea she has this time to learn about pirates." Cole muttered to himself before disappearing from the room in a whirl of a grey ash colored blur.

--

**San Francisco Bay Mirror**

Phoebe now stood at the movie critic's desk asking about everything he knew that there was to know about pirate movies. Leslie joined the duo talking about pirate movies and started talking to Cole's ex-wife about their date tonight.

"This is your brilliant plan? Phoebe I think you may be getting swept up in to the movies a little too much." Cole's temper rose with worry as he glared at the man known as Leslie. His wife had always been fond of older movies but he doubted that now was the time to depend on that love to defeat their current foes. Cole swore to himself some more as he watched Phoebe and Leslie now talking about Pirate movies and a thought crossed Cole's mind. Leslie was finishing telling Phoebe about the structure of pirates, and the way the Captain could face a mutiny. That was all he had learned from watching the old movies and that there was a difference between the types of pirate movies. Phoebe said her thank you and promised to see Leslie tonight as she left the office of The Bay Mirror.

"It's worth a shot" he mumbled again going unnoticed then he added "Its times like this where I really hate being in Limbo. Talking to myself is a pain!" With that the form of Cole Turner blurred out in the same ashy colored swirls and reappeared in the Halliwell Manor, in Phoebe's room to be more specific.

"I have just enough time to do this before she realizes her movie is randomly floating about." Cole muttered to himself as he forced every ounce of his will power in to materializing himself long enough to push through her shelf of movies and pulled out the one she had mentioned earlier. The tall ex-demon stared at it with some disgust before pulling the DVD out of the case and disappearing to the living room where he forced more of his energy in to materializing on the plane of living long enough again to put the movie in to the player and pressing play. Cole reemerged completely now in to his plane of the in-between and focused on the TV. Leo was with the boys in the solarium and had not heard the TV being turned on in the living room Cole focused as he closed his eyes and held his hands towards the screen.

Conjuring was much harder to do if you were pulling a character out of the screen and even worse when doing it from the plane of Limbo. But Cole knew his powers worked enough but never left this plane of life as the area in front of the television began to glow before a figure stood in front of him. The figure looked confused, he wore his dark brown hair down with beads decorating a few strand and with a dark brown captain's hat. The man also wore a white shirt with dark pants, boots and had piercing brown eyes outlined in black coal.

"Wait. I conjure a character from the movie and get stuck with Jack Sparrow?" Cole yelled in frustration and Jack turned to face him with a suspicious look crossing his tan face.

"It's Captain Jack Sparrow, savvy?" He responded in his defense. The pirate captain took a side glance around the room and tried to gain his bearings, Cole continued to glare at him with annoyance.

"That's great whatever. You are going to help me got it?" Cole responded with out telling Jack what was going on and the pirate then glared up at the slightly taller man.

"Sorry no luck mate. You need to tell me what's going on before I even so much as move an inch." Jack replied as he rested his hand on the holster where his sword rested. Cole rolled his eyes.

"Pirates!" He yelled in exasperation and Jack grinned as if it was a compliment. "That was not a compliment. You will help me or else more witches will die."

"What?" Jack Sparrow quipped back as he arched an eye brow and held Cole's gaze with a confused glare of his own. "Witches? Like Tia Dalma?"

Cole had been locked in Limbo for a few years now and had not had the chance to see the newest installments of the movie line, he only watched the first one once when Phoebe made him take her to see it.

"Yeah sure whatever. Listen you aren't real, you're from a movie. Do you understand?" Cole spoke trying to persuade this conjured pirate character to understand.

"Hm I feel real. So you aren't doing a very good job of persuading me, mate." Jack shot back with a grin.

"No you feel real because I called you here." Cole responded as he felt his temper rising and wanted to avoid an all out battle. The time he had to persuade this pirate was limited. Jack pulled out a sword and pointed it at Cole catching him by surprise as the green eyes lit up with anger.

"What in the bloody hell?" Jack then muttered as Cole's hand began radiating with a blue-white light and inside the glowing orb, electric beams danced around. Jack's eyes lit up with confusion and hope at the same time. "Can you teach anyone to do that mate?"

Cole looked down at his energy ball and realized he had summoned it in defense with out trying to and shook his head with frustration. "Put the sword down Jack."

"No." Jack began then turned and ran towards the door trying to pull it open as Leo walked with Wyatt in tow in to the living room, Chris in his arms and he glared down at the TV as Cole then noted that the movie was still playing and it was on the scene where Elizabeth Turner was confronting Captain Barbossa.

"Wyatt did you turn this movie on?" Leo asked as he turned to his son who shook his blonde topped head. "Great that means we have a ghost with a sick sense of humor apparently."

"Something like that." Cole muttered in answer before returning his attention to the pirate captain who could not make the door budge no matter how much effort he put in to. Cole grinned realizing that as long as he was stuck here so was Jack until he found a way to connect the conjured character to be a part of Phoebe.

"Bugger!" Jack yelled out as Cole strode towards the conjured Pirate.

He released his low-voltage energy ball as it headed towards Jack Sparrow who saw it in a side ways glance before deflecting it by using his sword and swinging at it.

"Home run for the pirate? Now is not the time to be playing games!" Cole yelled in frustration as he ducked before his own attack hit him and watched the ball dematerialize. Jack walked back towards the former demon with a defensive stance and a suspicious glare.

"Tell me what's in it for me." Jack spoke up quickly before he was being grabbed by Cole and dragged towards the TV and the form of Wyatt walked through the two. He forced the pirate to look at the television that was playing the first Pirates of the Caribbean movie, The Curse of the Black Pearl.

Jack watched with curiosity at the contraption in front of him before he glared back at Cole "What is this thing? Why is it playing out my life?" Jack questioned.

"You still don't get it. You are not real and if you help me I can make it so you get back to your life what ever that may be. Got it?" Cole shot back with his temper rising even more. He had better things to do including finishing the last parts of his plan to help Phoebe finding love again.

Jack twirled his finger in his beard as if in thought when Cole turned to hear Phoebe walking back in to the manor and announcing that she needed to go to Magic School. "What are you?" Jack questioned breaking Cole out of his daydream while watching the dark haired woman.

"I used to be a demon. My name is Cole; Happy now?" He shot back with frustration but then saw his ex-wife gliding closer to him and calmed at her presence.

"Did your plan work?" Leo asked when Phoebe finally found him watching her movie and glanced at it with a smirk.

"Yea but apparently I am not the only one who had that idea. Between Leslie and the Movie Critic at my job I learned some helpful information. However I am not sure how much it's going to help." Phoebe answered to her brother-in-law who nodded his head.

"Great, movie pirates versus real pirates." Leo muttered in response.

Jack Sparrow watched with amusement now as things got interesting when he saw a woman saunter in and mention something about pirates. "I'll help." He then piped up as he saw the glare of Cole and faked a look of innocence.

"How do you even know that I want you to help her?" Cole spit out through clenched teeth.

"Am I not?" Jack asked with a grin.

"Listen _mate_ do not take her lightly." Cole began with his glare still worn on his face. "She is going to question your motives and if you are real. Besides the pirates you are dealing with are very real. There are also a few rules if I can even push you on to that plane of life." Cole continued with a smooth voice.

"Right. Well then get to it." Jack responded and Cole rolled his eyes at the pirate's answer.

"I should be able to push you enough in to the line of sight of Phoebe, and Phoebe alone. I do not want her going in to this fight against some pirate crew with out any help she can get but you can not at any point tell her who sent you! Got it?" Cole began and Jack nodded his head with a grin.

"Yea right no telling. No worries I think the last thing that will cross my mind is to tell her about another man. She is a rather fine strumpet." Jack replied but received the angry look again. He then grinned with a mischievous glance in Phoebe's direction. "Phoebe huh? Seems you have love for her mate."

"Not funny. She is my ex-wife and I am telling you it will not be so easy to convince her that you are just here to help." With that Cole held his hands out and Jack Sparrow began to blur in slight fuzz that resembled a television screen when the picture goes out. He began to become more visible again as he appeared in front of Phoebe Halliwell who was walking up the stairs as she stopped in her tracks and froze at who she saw.

"Ok apparently I have been talking about pirate movies to much…"

"Hello Love. Capt. Jack Sparrow at your service." He greeted with a grin as she glanced down and saw Leo giving her a strange look of confusion.

"Wow it actually worked." Cole observed out loud to himself as he followed on his own plane of Limbo up the stairs towards Phoebe's room. She was preparing a few things before she was going to have Leo orb her to Magic School.

Jack Sparrow was still uncertain what was going on but followed the dark haired woman's lead to what appeared to be a bedroom. She glared over her shoulder and turned on the pirate as he stood there watching her and noticing her very attractive body. "What are you exactly I get that only I can see you but what are you."

"Me?" Jack asked and Phoebe nodded her head yes.

"Yeah you! Do you see any other people in this room?" She shot back and Jack turned to face Cole who glared at him. Jack still ignored it as he began to point towards his direction but was cut off by Cole yelling.

"I do not know how you can see me Sparrow! But do not tell her I am here or I swear you will regret it." Cole boomed as Jack quickly took his outreached finger and turned in an awkward stride turning his attention back to Phoebe and placing his finger on her cheek to trace her jaw.

"Lovey I am here to help. You need a pirate on your side and here I am." Jack quickly answered with a smile and Phoebe turned her head away from his touch. He was corporeal and yet not.

"Tell her only she can see you. Make something up keep going with your original lie." Cole shot at him.

"I know that." Captain Jack Sparrow quipped before turning his attention back to Phoebe. "Listen love, I am here for you because you called for me. That means only you can see me. Why are you so surprised you are a witch after all?"

Phoebe glared up at him. "Right but I did not cast a spell to conjure you, so are you a mental echo of my desires?"

"What? Yes, yes that's what I am." Jack shot back hiding his confusion.

"Do you really think you can help me?" Phoebe questioned with suspicion and Jack Sparrow feigned hurt.

"I am Captain Jack Sparrow. Of course I can!" As the two began to converse and Jack Sparrow reported more facts about pirates their codes, and above all else that pirates were bound to their captain unless they called for mutiny. He went on to tell Phoebe that he would guide her along the way and caused her to laugh when he leaned over and whispered in to her ear, causing Cole to tense in jealousy.

"Watch it Pirate or I will send you back in to that movie." Cole muttered as Jack returned his attention to the man standing in the corner of the room.

"Hey you called for me to help her. Sending me back would ruin your purpose now wouldn't it mate?" Jack spoke up and Phoebe gave him a glance of worry.

"Who are you talking to? Who sent you to help me?" Phoebe said suspiciousness crossing in her voice again.

"Do not tell her!" Cole yelled in anger, Jack grinned at Phoebe and raised his head.

"Would you believe sea turtles?" Jack shot back in answer.

--

**Magic School**

As Leo orbed Phoebe to Magic School before quickly returning back to the Manor where the boys were and Cole followed suit taking the conjured semi-corporeal pirate by the arm and the two disappeared in a whirl of ashy colored swirls again. Jack looked around the swirling grey and shook his head.

"Ashes to ashes I see." Jack muttered and caught a glare from Cole before they arrived at Magic School behind Phoebe Halliwell as she now stood talking with Piper about learning everything she could from Leslie and Jack let out a grunt. Phoebe paused at the sound while Piper questioned her about her date and they then turned their attention on to their youngest sister who had dropped a bottle.

"That's interesting." Jack spoke up as he walked to stand over the younger woman with red hair and next to the one he knew as Phoebe.

"No that's bad." Cole shot at him as worry returned for his ex sister-in-law.

Cole could not have been more right as things went from bad to worse. Jack followed in Phoebe's shadow while she and the one he learned whose name was Piper to Treasure Island and they found Brenda.

"Be careful. Pirates don't run from fights, they lure you in." Phoebe reported when Jack grinned.

"That is not always true." He muttered and caught a quick glare from Phoebe before she returned her attention to the feeble old woman and calling Piper over. Jack leaned over them before taking in his surrounding and shook his head. This was definitely a pirate cove if he ever saw one.

As the group was having their own problem at Treasure Island, Paige kept aging by the minute in front of Cole if he did not do something she would end up dying and his future plan would fail to work.

"You can't die Paige do you hear me!" Cole yelled at the old form of Paige Matthews on the couch who did not hear Cole trying to yell in to her mind it seemed. Cole turned and punched the wall behind him with rage. "Of course not. You are old, deaf, and I am stuck in this cosmic void!" He yelled to himself now.

Paige felt her sisters pull her from the couch as they took her back to the manor and called for Leo to heal her. When that failed Cole and Jack watched in frustration as the pirate captain saw the parrot before the witches did.

"Shiver me witches" it squawked twice before Leo took a piece of paper and passed it over to Piper and Phoebe.

"Your best bet is to go, savvy?" Jack spoke up as he walked over and leaned in talking to Phoebe. The middle sister turned to face her older sister and forced a weak grin.

"We have to go Piper; it is the only way to save Paige." Phoebe reported and Piper nodded her agreement with a grim facial expression.

"You hang in there ok?" Piper spoke with soothing words down to her youngest sister lying on the couch and Cole grinned at the irony of that statement. It was the same thing Prue had said to Phoebe when he helped Prue break the time loop.

The trio left again as once again the conjured pirate shadows Phoebe. "This is not helping her any you know." Jack shot back over his shoulder and Cole just glared at the pirate as they left.

"Why did I think conjuring you was such a good idea? Apparently Phoebe rubbed off on me to much over the years." Cole then whispered to himself.

--

While at Treasure Island Phoebe and Piper were caught in an ambush as Jack pulled out his sword in defense before realizing he was only seen by the witch and cursed the man who summoned him from where he was.

"Invoke the right of parlay. Hurry!" Jack shouted to Phoebe who rolled her eyes.

"We were invited." Piper spoke at them with hesitation as she glanced at the four pirates' swords.

"Invited? Or were you tricked" a pirate answered and now Phoebe took the moment to speak up.

"Now you wouldn't want to be violating parlay would you?" Phoebe said with ease as Jack grinned at his accomplishment.

"Good Love. Now what you need to do is plant that seed of doubt in at least one of'em. That will lead to a mutiny if you're lucky." Jack added smoothly as the engagement took place and Captain Black Jack Cutting appeared causing Sparrow to frown at him.

"I am so a better captain then him." Jack muttered and Cole appeared in an ashy blur next to him.

"Sparrow I hardly think that is the point right now." Cole quipped on his arrival.

"Bloody hell. When did you get here?" Jack spoke up as he pulled his sword out. Phoebe returned her gaze to the pirate as he spoke the question and Cole punched the Pirate in the shoulder.

"Your job is done. I think they have all the info they need from you so now its time to go." Cole spoke with irritation.

"Bugger, things were just getting fun Mate." Jack shot up to the slightly taller man who glared at him and shook his head as he took a deep breath. "I did not know ghosts could breath." Jack quickly added.  
They all then returned to the Manor as Cole allowed Jack time to say goodbye to the person he was shadowing, while Piper wrote a spell and explained what was to happen next to Leo.

"So wait why are you saying bye? I thought you were psychic echo of mine and we aren't done facing the cursed pirates yet." Phoebe muttered as Jack leaned in and smiled. Cole looked away with rage and fought the urge to rip the pirate away from his ex-wife.

"If you are going to do that, do it right." Cole shot at him in suspense. "Tell her that her eyes are beautiful and that she is strong so you know that she can defeat these beings with the information you gave her."

"Sweet mother of god, whose saying bye here me or you?" Jack spoke turning his gaze over his shoulder.

"You really are crazy aren't you?" Phoebe spoke up and rolled her eyes "Piper and Cole were right," She froze when she said Cole's name for a moment causing the former demon, now corporeal soul locked in Limbo, to tense and give her a look of pain. "You aren't all there are you?" She finally continued with her statement.

"Ah I see Mate." Jack spoke up with his knowing look and grinned. "Perhaps you conjured me here to help you both? I am a man of my word as you are of yours," He began when Phoebe spoke up.

"Do not finish that statement. Please?" Cole tried to be polite.

"Why not?" He questioned in his defense as he looked at Phoebe as if he was talking to her and not Cole. "Pirate!" He yelled a little bit louder causing both Cole and Phoebe to jump after Cole muttered about him not being fair or reasonable.

"Well I suppose you are right." Phoebe responded as Cole took note of the time.

"Fine if you want to help me repeat what I said. Please you are the only connection I have had to her in a long time." Cole finally admitted.

"Right well then. Listen love, it is time to go for me." He leaned in and found that he was a solid being when it involved Phoebe as he grinned and arched his eye brow. He placed his rough hand on Phoebe's cheek as she looked at him with surprise. "You have very beautiful eyes Phoebe. From what I have seen you would make a fine pirate yourself with that strong will. I have told you all that I need to and you will defeat these beings and save your sister. Just remember there are two things you need to know always. What a person can do and what a person can't do. You can go and save your sister with the other or stay here and dwell on a man who's not real. Your choice love."

"You're right I am going to win with Piper and go and get that chalice, thank you Jack Sparrow." she said in answer with an awkward grin.

"It's captain lovey." He smiled back in response.

"Tell her that she can never trust a pirate and to be cautious." Cole spoke up again.

"Remember going in there tonight Phoebe. You can never trust a pirate to keep their word especially since you are not a pirate. That captain is no different then Barbossa and so he is not a pirate with honor. Also know this, there is a spirit watching over you and I know love when I see it. Besides it would never have worked between us." Jack Sparrow commented before leaning in and placing a kiss on Phoebe as he wore a mischievous grin when he pulled back causing her to nod her head. Cole glared at the pirate when he said the last part and pulled him to stand. Phoebe glanced around the room as Jack disappeared.

"What was that about a spirit watching over me?" She muttered with frustration before standing as she heard Leo and Piper coming from the attic arguing about going to the museum.

"Time to go. NOW!" Cole yelled before Jack could say any more he realized he was not visible to Phoebe any longer. "What was that bull shit about you being a man of your word? You just revealed me!"

"Mate, you were the one that said you can never trust a pirate." Jack smiled and was taken in the same usual blur to the television where Cole forced his hand on to the plane of living switching the movie still in the DVD player to turn on again.

"Well this has been fun. You will not remember any of this." Cole muttered with frustration as he focused his energy and Jack faded back in to the movie with the flurries of black and white but not before grinning at Cole and rolling his eyes.

--

**Restaurant**

Leslie was sitting at table as he kept glancing at his watch and feeling the irritation over whelm him as Phoebe was already late. He flipped open his phone and dialed her number but there was no answer.

Cole blurred in behind the man and grinned. "You are not good enough for her you know." Cole muttered and noticed Leslie asking for the check. Cole had drained a lot of his spiritual energy from shifting planes but forced himself to materialize for a moment to knock over the water in front of the ghost-writer.

"What the hell?" Leslie yelled as the water spilled on to his lap. Cole grinned with satisfaction.

"Apparently spending the day with Captain Jack Sparrow and dealing with the cursed pirates as well as trying to save Paige caused Phoebe to completely forget about you. There was a benefit to the character I conjured after all." Cole answered knowing full well Leslie would not hear him but he blurred out after the thought with a sadistic grin on his face.

_**The End:**_

_End Note: Ok please keep in mind that this was completely for fun ;). Also I realized in the movies Jack is obviously not a one woman pirate and so would have no hesitation in kissing Pheebs if this ever actually happened. Also I could not help but use him as a connection between Cole and Phoebe at the end but I kind of got sad for Cole writing it L. I hope you enjoyed this and the humor in it, I know it is a huge crazy what if story. I also could not help and do the what if at the end if Cole found a way to make things hard for Leslie any chance he got because frankly Leslie annoyed me the most out of all of Phoebe's relationships after Cole and we know from Seven Year Witch that he can pick up and materialize for short bursts of time since he picked up that picture of Phoebe while talking to Piper. Thanks! -Lunara_


End file.
